Saturday, March 30, 2013

What I Know

This is my first Easter season with someone close to my heart in Heaven.  I am thankful that Evie is safe in the arms of Jesus, but every part of me wishes she were still here.  Shopping for her Easter Sunday dress would have been sublime.  And making a matching rosette headband, well that would have been the icing on the sweetest cake.  But God had different plans.  

There are many truths about God and His character in my head, things I know to be true simply because they are found in scripture.  But, all pretense aside, they aren't exactly changing how I feel very much these days.  It's like eating your vegetables - you know they are good for you, but it doesn't mean you feel like shoving fistfuls of green into your mouth any time hunger strikes.  Some things in life involve conscious choices, willful acts in which feelings may not even play a part.

So, this special weekend dedicated to reflecting on Christ's death and resurrection, I am choosing to focus on what I know and not how I feel.  And these are things I know: 

I am a sinner.  Times infinity.
Christ endured the cruelest torture and most ridiculing shame and ultimately died for my sins upon an old rugged cross. 
Christ rose from the grave after three days.  He conquered death.
He is now alive in Heaven and offers the gift of eternal life to all who believe on His name.  
Evie is in Heaven.
Because I have trusted in Christ for salvation, I will see her again.

Simple truths, monumental ripples.  The simplicity of the Easter story has never resonated in my heart so deeply as it does now.  

Thank you Jesus.  Really truly thank you.  I'm sorry I don't feel like celebrating.  I hope my choosing to do so anyway is a sweet smelling offering to your most holy Name.  

Because of Your cross, my debt is paid.  
Because of Your love, my sins are washed away.
Now all of my life I freely give.  
Because of Your love, because of Your love I live.
-Phil Wickham, Because of Your Love


14 comments:

  1. Always a treasure in my heart to be able to read your words; they speak to me in the most profound way. You have changed me and deepened my faith and I thank you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Cathy. Wishing you and Jim a Happy Easter.

      Delete
  2. Oh, Sarah. My heart is hurting for yours this Easter with your fresh loss, but I am so encouraged and excited with you that your sweet Evie is safe in the arms of the One who died for us all. Does this ever make you wonder how in the world people get through without the security and sureness of Jesus?! How thankful I am for the opportunity we have for an eternal perspective. All is NOT lost, and we will see Him and you will see Evie again one day. What hope.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Amen! I actually think about that all the time - how does anyone do life without Jesus? Marriage, parenting, hardship ... impossible without Him.

      Delete
  3. I wish I was picking out a first Easter dress too... your words here are perfect, thank you for that. Praying for you this Easter weekend! The title of your blog made me think of Sara Grove's song "What Do I know" which is (in my opinion :)) beautiful and comforting. Hugs and love to you Sarah!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Megan. Wishing you a Happy Easter. Thinking of sweet Baby Faith <3

      Delete
  4. "I'd give up all the world to see that little piece of heaven looking back at me"

    <3

    Thinking and praying for you, your heart, and your beautiful daughter.

    ReplyDelete
  5. As we are so often reminded this time of year, on Good Friday everything looked so horrifically wrong and bad, but Sunday was coming. We live each day for now as "Friday," but no matter what we're suffering today, Sunday's coming.

    ReplyDelete
  6. "Thank you Jesus. Really truly thank you. I'm sorry I don't feel like celebrating. I hope my choosing to do so anyway is a sweet smelling offering to your most holy Name."
    Amen to that!

    ReplyDelete
  7. It is indeed a sweet offering Sarah! It was such a deep heart celebration of Easter for me too. Thank you for writing about it. Ah, it hurts so much! But we march on, and soon enough we will make it to that bright and glorious place our babies are dwelling in. love and hugs!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Emma! What a unique perspective on Christ's death and resurrection these babies have given us <3

      Delete