Monday, October 15, 2012

pregnancy and infant loss awareness day

As a mommy one of the most awful things I could ever imagine is losing one of my babies.  Since having Micah I became especially sensitive to this idea because I finally had a true understanding of what mommy love was.  I wondered how I could ever handle losing a child.  Would I cope well?  Would I be able to move on?  Would I ever forget ...

I know now that there is no forgetting.  Even Scripture recognizes that concept:

Can a woman forget her nursing child, and not have compassion on the son of her womb?  Surely they may forget but I will not forget you. 
 Isaiah 49:15

The Lord uses the bond between mother and child to illustrate His love for His people.  And I am pretty convinced this verse rings true even if you've never nursed your child a day in your life.  There is something amazing and unspeakably soul touching about growing a life inside of you and having that little one bound to you for all eternity.  

So today in honor of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day I want to celebrate that bond that made you a mommy.  Maybe you were able to hold your baby but not for very long; you are a mommy.  Maybe you were only able to celebrate the double pink lines or the blue plus sign for a few weeks; you are a mommy.  Maybe you spent hours in the NICU praying and crying over the sweetest little bundle you ever laid your eyes on but were unable to take home; you are a mommy.  Maybe you never made it past the first trimester phase of exhaustion and morning sickness; you are a mommy.  Maybe you enjoyed your baby for a few unbelievable months only to lose them to an unforeseen tragedy; you are a mommy.  

Whatever your story may be nothing can erase the fact that there is a little soul in heaven who calls you mommy.  And no matter the length of time or manner in which they were here on this earth I imagine nothing can erase the pain of losing them.  But today I want to remember them with you.  And I want to honor the person on this earth who loves them more than anyone possibly can.  

You, their mommy.  

If you feel so inclined, I invite you to leave the name(s) of the little ones you lost in the comment section.  I would count it such a privilege to pray for you today and thank the Lord for those little blessings by name.


  1. March 1989, My Baby Boy Rieke. We hadn't decided on a name yet. I was 5 months along when he died.

  2. September 16, 2006... Asher Stephen Casper
    July 10, 2007... Cyrus John Casper

    I love you friend <3

  3. January 2008. We lost our precious baby. I was not far enough along to know if I was carrying a boy or a girl, but Laney and I like to talk about our "sister" in heaven. She says she still loves our baby even if he is a boy, but she hopes he's not:) Either way, a piece of our family in in heaven with Jesus and my daddy. The thought of them together brings joy to my heart.

  4. I lost my precious Maryella on April 8, 2011, due to Trisomy 13. She was 4 weeks old. I was the Mommy sitting in the NICU praying for a miracle. I now have 3 month old, Isaac, who will know all about his sissy!

  5. My first, is known only by the name his or her Father in heaven has given. My second I call Samuel, though I did not look closely enough to determine (don't even know if it would have been apparent only 3 months along, with each), either way, boy or girl, in my thoughts that one is Samuel,

    ...they kissed one another, and they wept together, but David more so. Then Jonathan said to David "go in peace, since we have both sworn in the name of the Lord, saying,'may the Lord be between you and me...forever.'"
    1Samuel 41-42

    This is a beautiful post Sarah. I think of these two often, but it is rare that anyone else is interested. They are a very significant piece of my life, still, and always. I am thankful for their lives and joyfully anticipate forever, together.

  6. Jared Tyler - July 19, 1995. He was 7 months old. I was the mommy who lost mine to an unexpected tragedy.

    Sarah, you are such an inspiration to other mommies who know your pain <3